more other…
My other commitments have been dispensed with. Back to the program….
My family has also been driving me nuts. God forbid they read this, but here goes: They always tend to call when I’m in the middle of something at work, and expect that they’ll get my full attention. When they don’t get my full attention, they get short and upset (or maybe that’s me). And if I don’t answer, they don’t leave a message - it’s almost like they want my full attention when they want it, and if they don’t get it, fuck it.
I know I’ve said that last phrase to at least one person who means the world to me in my life lately, and if so, it’s probably more than a little bit of misplaced anger.
My mom asked me to come home this weekend for my sister’s birthday - asked me if I could find the time. Going home these days is such a huge energy drain. Something I used to find peaceful and enjoyable is now dramatic and painful and that makes me terribly sad. And I’m also a little bit bitter about my sister’s pattern of finding herself invited to something, changing all the plans to suit her better, and then completely bailing on it. Say what you want, but it happened twice in the two weeks around my birthday.
I’ve been wanting to hang out with my group of close friends lately - I’ve been missing them, and haven’t had much time with them. I planned a little shindig last weekend, with fresh oysters from Farmers’ Market, some ribs, and chicken legs, and most of the people said they could make it over, but - of course - the weather didn’t work out.
And to that end, I wanted to hit up Farkas’ poker night tonight - to catch up with a group of friends that hasn’t seen much of me, nor I of them - but couldn’t make it because I got in a huge meta-argument.
*le sigh*
