the daily dub

Some of you may know that last year, CPLUG was given 8 computers to setup as a linux cluster. Well, with all the remodelling, our cluster was removed, and then appropriated by Tim Kearns and our (Noah and my) Senior Project Advisor, Mike Haungs. Apparently, we didn’t make enough progress on their projects, which oddly enough, we were never even told about. Now, don’t me wrong, I don’t mention names to get these professors killed, Mike Haungs is a cool guy, and I don’t know a damn thing about Kearns, I just think its very unprofessional to NOT complain if no progress is getting made on your projects. Maybe if we had some feedback from the so incredibly aloof faculty around this campus, we would have known that we were supposed to be doing something else, and weren’t going in the right direction. But no, the faculty could not be bothered to make student contact, after all we’re just undergrads, and grad students are so much more important that undergrads (correct me if I’m wrong, and I’m not, but you have to be an undergrad before you can be a grad student). Long story short, they want to take the cluster away from the Linux Users’ Group, and blame the whole thing on the only two guys who ever did any work on it (not counting Pharkas), Me and Noah.

I just love college… don’t you?

Don’t you hate that when you have an impulse and decide not to follow it… I wanted to bring my camera to school today, and should have: they are having a display that mocks the commercialization of Christmas and Easter (it’s about damn time someone told those capitalist fucks to leave Jesus alone.) Too bad I have no camera to show you…

Wow, so I had straight night mares last night.. It’s been a damn long time since I’ve had dreams like that. From what I remember, it had something to do with my jaw hurting lately… wtf… I think it is related to something having to do with my surgery… my jaw may be moving (it shouldn’t) and it scares the shit out of me. I don’t want to go through that surgery again…

Couldn’t sleep tonight and randomly wrote a poem in french:

Une femme

J’ai faim pour une femme
Une femme seulement
Elle est ma vie en rose…

Je suis fatigué de la monde
La monde tres truqué
Il est morne sans elle…

Vous épicez ma vie
Tout les mots que vous dites
Me rend bonheur

© 2004, Ryan Jeffrey Du Bois

I’m starting to feel much more at home alone in my room again. It has taken a while, but not having a girlfriend anymore is both freeing and sad. I bought a nice rug ($130) for my room, which makes it much more cozy. The fact that I can do anything I want in my own room just rocks. It makes a pretty good recording studio too, as my link of musical recordings can attest to. Has pretty good room reverb. I spent all of tonight meditating, writing this entry, updating my website, and listening to cool african music (Ladysmith Black). It feels really… well.. interesting being in my room: my room accepts me, flaws and all, and doesn’t try to change anything. It doesn’t laugh when my voice cracks when I sing; it doesn’t get defensive when I am angry; it doesn’t think I’m odd when I remove my chair, drink Matte, and meditate on the floor. My room rocks the house. It is my sanctuary.